During my years of anime watching, very few shows have had such a huge impact on me personally. I believe every weeb has that one anime—be it a movie or a show—that directly resonates with them. For me, that anime is Evangelion.

Evangelion is not simply just an anime; it's a profound exploration of the human soul...my soul. It does an impressive job at resonating deeply with anyone. Most of the time, especially in the last 10 episodes, Evangelion feels like a raw unfiltered reflection of my own struggles and emotions. People who haven't watched the show simply wouldn't understand and might be thinking how I'm relating to a mecha anime. That's where you're wrong—this isn't just a mecha anime.

[spoiler]The main character 'Shinji' is the literal embodiment of depression. The sheer overwhelming sense of isolation, crippling depression, and anxiety is relatable and is probably the most realistic depiction of any character in fiction ever. [/spoiler]

The tone of the show jumps from teenagers fighting aliens in mech suits to light slice-of-life moments to a rather melancholic yet haunting experience. Each episode pulls me deeper into the show, from the eerie soundtrack and the beautiful yet isolated cityscapes to the emptiness of the world. How meticulously thought out every little detail in the anime is horrifyingly beautiful.

[spoiler] From the very first episode to the last, each and every character in the cast has a well-thought-out arc, each differing from one another yet being equally relatable. Characters like Asuka initially left a bitter taste in me until I came to my senses. With each character depicting a different set of emotions and values, I saw a reflection of myself in each of them. Sure, I wasn't forced to battle aliens and kill humans at the age of 14, but I could still relate to Shinji's anxiety and depression, along with the loneliness and Asuka's need for acceptance. It made me feel the pain of each and every character of the show. Asuka masking her insecurities with a tough facade reminded me of the various masks that I wear when I interact with different people. Rei's quiet and ethereal personality felt like a symbol of the parts of me that I myself am still searching for. Who am I really? What is my purpose? [/spoiler]

I have always been a sucker for shows and movies that draw the viewer in and make them think twice about reality and illusion. [spoiler] For decades, the last two episodes of the show have been considered lackluster and underwhelming. While I do agree to a certain extent, I just can't ignore the fact that the narrative masterfully shifted, drawing an unclear line between reality and a dream. Firstly, it gave me a strange and lingering sense of comfort. It was as if the show understood me, for it is me who is supposed to understand the show. The confusion and overwhelming sense of being lost were all gone...or were they? When I finished the show, all the questions that weren't resolved, all the plot holes that were lingering, and all the characters came rushing back with punch after punch. Evangelion has never been known to provide clear-cut answers; it leaves you with more questions than answers. I missed the person I was 26 episodes before...not worrying about what happened to Shinji, Asuka, or Rei. The surreal nature of the ending felt like a dropkick in the balls...shattered. [/spoiler]

[This is where I recommend checking out the movie. The movie solves all the questions you have, provides a better conclusion to the story, and will leave you broken beyond repair.]

At last, Neon Genesis Evangelion to me is more than a series. It has resonated with me on a deeper level than I ever knew existed. It wasn't a show that entertained me through bizarre fights; it was a form of media that made me want to confront my insecurities and the sheer aspects of my own existence. In the end, Evangelion is a journey through the darkest and deepest emotions known to man. The storytelling, weaving together a tapestry of masterful self-reflecting bits, made me connect with my own innermost self, reminding me that we are not alone in this world, and that even in our darkest moments...there will always be that flicker of hope.