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User Reviews for: The Coffee Table

$hubes
2/10  7 months ago
For the first-time watcher, be advised that this is a Spanish movie with English subtitles (apparently) hardcoded. So you can watch it (assuming you want to) but just go in knowing that you can't change the language from its native Spanish. That being said, the first thing that caught my attention - and gave me pause about even watching this - was the age of the so-called "mother" and the "infant". The mom looks like she could easily be past menopause and the "infant child" is already old enough to suck its thumb; definitely doesn't look like a newborn. While I'm not an aficionado on foreign films - and certainly not films produced in Spain - I would assume that the standard for acting should at least be similar to other films and in that case, this one fails terribly.

"The deed" happens at 00:19:22 but then you're left with another 70 minutes of utter drivel. I first read about this film on a Google feed and wasn't sure what to expect but honestly, this was very, **VERY** anticlimactic. I mean, sure, they broke the boundaries and showed something that no other movie (to date) has shown but apart from that... What was the point? To depict a tragedy that no other movie has dared to show? If so, you did it and I suppose you can feel some sick sense of pride in it but honestly, as a movie, this just sucked. There was **_nothing_** worth watching after the so-called "deed" at the 19-minute mark. And even then, all you're given is an implied something; there's no gruesome shots, no violence...and ultimately no story. Why this was "blowing up Twitter" is beyond me. News flash, people: Just because Stephen King supposedly gives a rave review to some particular film doesn't automatically mean it should be worth watching. This one isn't and was another huge waste of time. What was depicted was bad enough but I'm a big boy and I can handle extreme violence. (There is one particular horror film that, from everything I've read about it, I will never want to watch it simply because of what it contains.) But it wasn't just that this film depicted something horrific, a tragedy that should never happen; it was also just plain BAD. It was just bad movie. Anyone with even the remotest interest in this should watch the first 20-25 minutes (so you can see what has everyone in an uproar) and then skip ahead to the final 5-10 minutes. Seriously. This movie was not "horror"; it was just awfully bad. Don't be fooled - as I was - by any hype or media you read about this: this was just a really bad movie that consisted of ONE tragic event wrapped up by another 85 minutes of absolute bland nothingness. What a waste of time.
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Reply by MrBLAQK
7 months ago
Watched this the other day and the subs were definitely not hardcoded.
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