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User Reviews for: The Blair Witch Project

$hubes
4/10  one year ago
Not my first time to watch it but after watching it with fresh eyes, I'm still very unimpressed. Why this was supposed to be such a "scary" movie is beyond me. Even the "creepy" moments were few and far between...unless, of course, being lost in the woods with a hysterical, demanding bitch is your worst phobia, in which case, this film probably _would_ give you nightmares. First thought about halfway into this film is that someone should have knocked "Heather" (played all-too-well by Rei Hance) in the head with one of those rocks they found piled into a cairn, and then left her unconscious for the "witch" - or whatever was chasing them - as some sort of sacrificial goat. There was absolutely nothing scary or horrific about this movie...and certainly if bloodshed, gore, and/or torture porn is your thing, you may as well not waste 81 minutes sitting through this one. _The Blair Witch Project_ should never have made it onto the list of _The 20 Best Horror Movies Ever Made_ (not even the list "according to Redditt", which is where I got the list from.) This is not a "horror" movie; it isn't even a "scary" movie...I would even rule out considering this one "spooky" or "creepy". There's just not enough here to merit it being included in such a list. The characters were too flimsy; the ONLY one with any personality that could be bought into was "Heather", and she was nothing short of bitchy, demanding, and annoying. The only emotion I felt while sitting through this one was a smug satisfaction near the end when she's tearfully apologizing (on camera, of course, as is EVERYTHING for Heather) for it all being "her fault". Yes, it was, Heather, it was indeed "all your fault" and I took real satisfaction - to the point of even grinning and nodding my approval - as she tearfully said her goodbyes and begged for forgiveness that she would never feel. Apart from that one moment, however, this was nothing but annoying, shallow, and snail-paced and certainly unworthy of being on the same list as Rob Carpenter's _The Thing_ , _Silent Hill_ , and _The Conjuring_ . **THOSE** were some scary movies. This was a minor...no, actually, a MAJOR annoyance but nothing more. Avoid this one unless you just want to throw away 81 minutes. In fact, even if you _want_ to throw away 81 minutes, do it in some better fashion. This isn't worth it.
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